Beach Rivalry: Sora VS Riku
by Anime Magic Girl
Summary: Riku and Sora at each other's throats at the beach! Riku is girly! Sora is horny! It's retarded!


Disclaimer: YAY!!! This story was written by me and my friend Allie! We realy hope you like it! Ok! Kigdom Hearts Dose not belong to me or my friend Allie. SO DON'T SUE US!!! OK! On with the show / story!  
  
The sun was shining more brightly and beautifully than it ever had on Destiny Island. The clear blue sea was reflecting the deep blue sky above. The white sand looked so soft and more pure than ever. It was a perfect day, and Riku, Sora and Kairi were not about to waste it.  
"Come on Sora! You lazy bumb." Said Kairi. "We have to get a good spot on the beach before the others get there!"  
"Yeah, come on Sora." Chimed in Riku. "Tidus and Waka have almost reached the island!"  
"I'm coming, I'm coming!" yelled Sora. "The knot isn't tight enough!" He was having trouble with the stupid knot on his boat. "Damn it! Stay put!" He ordered the knot. The knot then reared up and smacked Sora square in the ass. "Ow!"  
"Haha!" said the knot "I kicked your ass, which is more than Selphie, Waka, Tidus or (especially) Riku could ever do! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Although I'll bet you anything that Riku wanted to kick that ass all the way into his bedroom for obvious reasons! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" Sora backed slowly away from the psychotic rope and headed toward where his friends had set out their towels to lay on.  
After two hours of tanning, Riku sat up and stretched his arms. "Well, good people," he said. "Who wants to take a swim with me."  
Selphie, Waka, Tidus, Kairi, and Sora looked up. Riku's front side was fully tanned, but his entire back was white. Finally, after trying to hold in their laughter, everyone burst out laughing.  
"What's so funny?" asked Riku.  
"Um, Riku," said Kairi, trying to catch her breath. "You may want to think before swimming."  
Riku looked in the mirror and screamed like a girl, which caused another round of hysterical laughter.  
"One side chocolate another side vanilla," said Sora. "AND A GIRLY DREW BARRYMORE SCREAM FROM HIS MOUTH!"  
"He's going to act like a valley girl again," said Waka, playing with his stick. "'Like, shut up guys. It's like not my fault I look like a girl."  
Everyone stopped laughing and looked at Waka. "Dude," said Sora. "That's not funny."  
"Sorry," said Waka.  
"I'll finish tanning," said Riku, lying down on his stomach.  
"You sure you don't want to go swimming?" said Sora. "Because I think the fish would love to eat some of your chocolate and vanilla and hear that scream."  
Everyone laughed again. Riku, shaking with rage, stood up.  
"Eat this," he said, grabbing himself.  
"I really don't want to," said Sora. "I'm sure it tastes good with ketchup or something."  
Everyone laughed again, but stopped when they saw the angered look on Riku's face.  
"You're going to grab yourself again, aren't you?" said Sora.  
"No, I'm going to finish my tan so just shut up," said Riku, lying down on his stomach again.  
After two hours Riku's tan was even and everyone decided to go swimming. Riku was still furious with Sora. Sora ran ahead of everyone, but Riku came up behind Sora and pulled his swimming shorts down.  
"CONGRADULATIONS!" shouted Riku, running ahead into the ocean. "YOU'VE BEEN PANTS-ED!"  
"RIKU, YOU JACKASS," yelled Sora, running and trying to pull up his bathing suit.  
"Nice, uh. 'Giggle stick' Sora." Laughed Kairi. (A/N: OMG this is soooooo retarded. lol)  
"Shut up." Said Sora barely holding back a laugh. It was kind of funny and he did sorta deserve it. hey! Wait! No he didn't! "RIKU! YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR ASS CUS I'M ABOUT TO KICK IT!" Everyone stared at Sora.  
"Dude, what the HELL kind of dis is that?" asked Riku. Sora blushed, Now Riku really deserved a beating. "Um, Sora?" Said Kairi covering her eyes. "Your pants are still at your ankles!" He picked up his pants and tied them securely at the waist. "Can we look yet?" Asked Selphie peeking through her fingers. "Yeah yeah." Said Sora. Suddenly an apple came out of nowhere and hit Riku on the head. "Ow!" yelped Riku, again sounding like a girl. Everyone started to laugh. "IT'S NOT FUNNY!!!" "Hey! If me getting pants-ed is funny then you getting hit on the head with a random apple has to be funny. HAHAHAHAHA!!! .Wait! Apples don't grow on Destiny Island." Sora looked around to try and find where the apple had come from. "HOOO HOOO HEEE HAAA HOOO!" Screeched a monkey hanging from a nearby tree. Everyone stared at the monkey. ".Um. Hi! My name's Bob!" It said. "Hi Bob!" They all said in unison. "What are you doing here Bob?" inquired Sora. "Monkeys don't grow on trees." They all stared at Sora. "What!?!? Did my pants fall down again?" "Well, duh monkeys don't grow on trees," said Selphie. "And no your pants didn't fall down again. Your fly is open." Sora gave Selphie a weird look. "I don't have a fly," he said. "Selphie, no offense, but you can be so weird," said Kairi. "Ahem," Bob cleared his throat loudly. "Back to me. Riku and Sora are best friends and suddenly their friendship has turned into a rivalry. From teasing to grabbing themselves to pants-ing, this friendship has a downward spiral. I have one thing to settle their rivalry once and for all." Bob reached into his sweater vest and pulled out a pack of poker cards. "This will be settled with a poker game between the two," said Bob. "Ho-ho, you are dead," said Riku. "I am so good at poker." "Ho-ho you'll be eating those words," said Sora. "Or should I say you'll be eating this." Sora pretended to grab himself. "There's just one problem," said Kairi. "Neither one of them have money." "They have coconuts," said Bob. "They'll play for coconuts. The game will be held on the mini-island at 6:00. Everyone go home and prepare." At 6:00 everyone reported to the mini island. There was a light shining on a small card table that was set up and two chairs across from each other. A pile of coconuts was set next to the chairs and two piles of chips on either side of the table. Sora and Riku took their seats. "Your coconuts are mine, Sora," said Riku. "Your fly is open, Riku," said Sora. Riku fixed his fly and they started playing. The first four rounds Riku won. Then in the fifth round.... "I have a straight," said Sora in a singsong voice. "I have got your coconuts and you're a loser and your fly's still open." "WHAT?" Riku was horrified. He looked down to check. "Made you look," finished Sora in the same singsong voice. "So what." Stated Riku "You can only eat Tic-Tac's in even numbers, what's up with that?" No one laughed. "I am alone." Riku began to cry like a girl. "Shut up Faggety-Ann and play!" yelled Sora. "It takes a village people!" Cried Riku. Everyone stared at him. "What - The - Hell." Said Sora. "AAAARRRGH!" Shouted Bob. "You two are acting like such uncivilized. FREAKS! Forget the poker game! Just kiss and make-up!" Sora and Riku looked at each other. "Well," said Riku, "I'm up for it if you are!" Sora just stared at him. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" Sora ran to the edge of the island screaming and then jumped off and swam all the way home.  
  
The Next Morning  
  
Riku was sitting on the beach when he found Sora walking towards the boardwalk.  
"HEY SORA!" Riku called. Sora turned around and looked at Riku.  
"I'm sorry about yesterday," said Riku.  
"Me, too," said Sora. "I was just kidding about the whole scream thing."  
"I know," Riku said. "That wasn't my real scream, you know. I was just being funny."  
"What is your real scream?" asked Sora.  
Riku yelled out a Tarzan-like scream. Sora laughed and shook his head.  
"I preferred the girly laugh," said Sora. The two laughed together.  
"We cool?" asked Riku.  
"We cool," said Sora. The two hugged, but Riku pulled away quickly.  
"You're all sweaty," said Riku.  
"Kairi spent the night at my place," said Sora.  
"Wait...." said Riku. "Did you two?"  
"Yup and five minutes ago under the boardwalk," said Sora.  
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouted Riku. "I gotta go I'll talk to you later."  
Riku screamed and ran all the way home, trying desperately to get the disgusting images out of his mind.  
  
A/N: well. how was it? We thought it was pretty funny! R&R!!! 


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